‘Lucky’

The day after I had my positive test I made contact with my GP. Which sounds like the obvious thing to do. When I had my last miscarriage in 2021 I reached the ‘magic number’ of three, the point at which you become eligible for referral to the recurrent miscarriage services. By certain standards I was ‘lucky’ to be referred as my 3 miscarriages were not sequential.  

There is a huge amount to be said here about the extraordinary chasm that exists between the lived experience of a miscarriage and the medical response to it. Much has been said by people far more qualified than me and people are taking steps to bridge the chasm by, at the very least, mandating that a women should be offered a referral or follow-up after every miscarriage rather than experiencing a harrowing and frightening loss three times before they are offered even the most basic of checks.  

The holy trinity

The outcome from my contact with the recurrent miscarriage was that there was no obvious reason why I had lost three pregnancies. However, should I have another positive pregnancy test, I should take progesterone, extra folic acid and aspirin daily. The consultant kindly wrote me a script there and then so I could get the necessary medication the very moment I fall pregnant again.  

What I found out the day after my positive test thanks to Dr Google was that prescriptions have a 6 month expiry. As I was two and a half years down the track, the slip of pale green paper I kept with dimming hope in my filing cabinet was no longer valid and I was long discharged from the recurrent miscarriage clinic.  

The rarity of kindness

I’m afraid I’ve been on the wrong side of some blunt and insensitive reactions from people in the medical field a few too many times and it has left a legacy of cynicism combined with the knowledge that help and understanding isn’t always found where it should be. And so it was with a sense of resignation that I contacted my GP hoping and pleading that they would re-issue the prescription promptly and with minimum fuss.  

My last miscarriage brought with it many complications. Having been dismissed by my local EPU despite continued pain and heavy bleeding, I had no choice but to reach out to my GP. As it happened a man named Dr Lxx called me in response to the initial call I made to the surgery to explain what was happening. The first thing he said to me before making any attempt to triage or diagnose me was, in a voice so sincere and kind it stayed with me, ‘I’m so very sorry for your loss.’  

Those words and his voice have stayed with me. The smallest act of kindness can make a lasting difference to someone, as his did for me. And so when I received a text from my surgery later that day with a link to a prescription with all the same medication prescribed by the recurrent miscarriage consultant, I breathed a sigh of relief. Signed by Dr Lxx, I felt a sense of a circle completing. Maybe the universe has got my back this time.